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Funny Drinking Quotes Biography

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Something about today makes me want to be hungover tomorrow...

Friday is the beginning of my liver's workweek.

Your knowledge of wine is almost as impressive as your use of it to disguise your alcoholism.

Technically, you're not drinking alone if your kids are home.

Let's drink on the beach until we're no longer ashamed to show our bodies on the beach.

It's not drinking on the job if you weren't planning to do any work.

I buy store-brand groceries so I can afford top-shelf booze.

I snuck a bunch of booze into work today using my stomach...

The most expensive part of having kids is all the wine you have to drink.

If you ever see me drinking a Bud Lite Lime, I have been kidnapped and am trying to signal you.

I'm worried we're not saving enough for our retirement alcohol.

bantidas78When I drink alcohol...everyone says I'm alcoholic but When I drink Fanta...no one says I'm fantastic...

seandixonI drink on Sunday to forget that tomorrow is Monday.

I hate it when I'm drinking and somebody tries to correct my Vodkabulary.

Word of Advice: If a cop pulls you over and says, 'You drinking?' Never respond with, 'You buying?'

No officer, my speech isn't slurred. I'm just talking in cursive.

Playing a fun drinking game called: Girl alone with her cat.

When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk, and go to heaven!

There are many good reasons for drinking, one has just entered my head, if a man doesn't drink when he's living, how the hell can he drink when he's dead?

Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.

Beer is the reason I get out of bed every afternoon.

If you dont drink, then all of your stories suck and end with, And then I got home...

Brewers enjoy working to make beer as much as drinking beer instead of working .

One of the hallmarks of the baby boomer generation is that it doesnt live like the previous generation. It hasnt yet given up jeans and T-shirts or beer.

A drunk mans words are a sober mans thoughts.

The water was not fit to drink. To make it palatable, we had to add whiskey. By diligent effort, I learned to like it.

But the greatest lovethe love above all loves, Even greater than that of a mother...Is the tender, passionate, undying love, Of one beer drunken slob for another.

The best place to drink beer is at home. Or on a river bank, if the fish dont bother you.

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.

Nobody cares that youre smart and nobody cares that your kids dont have bruises.

I went out with a guy who once told me I didnt need to drink to make myself more fun to be around. I told him, I'm drinking so that youre more fun to be around.

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Funny Drinking Quotes Funny Quotes About Life About Friends And Sayings About Love About School Tumblr Tagalog For Kids About Girls

Funny Drinking Quotes Biography