Funny Sarcastic Quotes Funny Quotes About Life About Friends And Sayings About Love About School Tumblr Tagalog For Kids About Girls

Funny Sarcastic Quotes Biography

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Lexi_RoseI'm sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I really thought you already knew.

ritusagooDo not touch MY iPhone. It's not an usPhone, it's not a wePhone, it's not an ourPhone. It's an iPhone.

curly_girlPeople tell me there is plenty of fish in the sea, well that is nice and all but I'm human, I dont date fish.

Jessie93Love doesn't pay bills, unless you're a prostitute.

gingerbread023I speak 4 languages: English, Profanity, Sarcasm, and Real shit.

*Psyche_Rave*If the 2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still 2?

Magic_Mike_2.0I'm not single, I'm just wait for my girlfriend to quit playing hide and seek.

jacquelynWhen I said I'd hit that I meant with my car.

missteeq_mstLife is too short to waste time on matching socks.

missteeq_mstStop waiting for Prince Charming. Get up and find him.The poor idiot may be stuck in a tree or something.

A police officer asked me where I was between 4 and 5? I said kindergarten.

seandixonI hate people who say 'Age is just a number'...Age is clearly a word.

luv_jessThey say REVENGE is a dish best served cold. They also say REVENGE is sweet. This means, basically REVENGE is ICE-CREAM.

Be nice to everyone on your way to the top because you pass them all on the way down.

Look, if I'd wanted a lecture on the rights of man, I'd have gone to bed with Martin Luther.

That's okay, honey. I used to believe in things too.

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.

I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you don't like?

Mail your packages early so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas.

Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.

Women have a wonderful instinct about things. They can discover everything except the obvious.

Your services might be as useful as a barbershop on the steps of a guillotine.

A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction.

If you pretend to be good, the world takes you very seriously. If you pretend to be bad, it doesn't. Such is the astounding stupidity of optimism.

I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.

I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.

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Funny Sarcastic Quotes Funny Quotes About Life About Friends And Sayings About Love About School Tumblr Tagalog For Kids About Girls

Funny Sarcastic Quotes Biography